Jokes

learning
Posts: 398
Joined: Tue Jul 11, 2017 4:57 pm

All kids aren't stupid

Post by learning » Fri May 24, 2019 9:15 am

STUDENT WHO OBTAINED 0% ON AN EXAM

I would have given him 100%! Each answer is absolutely grammatically correct, and funny too. The teacher had no sense of humour!

Q1.. In which battle did Napoleon die?
*His last battle

Q2.. Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
*At the bottom of the page

Q3.. River Ravi flows in which state?
*Liquid

Q4.. What is the main reason for divorce?
*Marriage

Q5.. What is the main reason for failure?
*Exams

Q6.. What can you never eat for breakfast?
*Lunch & dinner

Q7.. What looks like half an apple?
*The other half

Q8.. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea, what will it become?
*Wet

Q9.. How can a man go eight days without sleeping?
*No problem, he sleeps at night.

Q10. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
*You will never find an elephant that has one hand.

Q11. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in other hand, what would you have?
*Very large hands

Q12. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?
*No time at all, the wall is already built.

Q13. How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it? *Any way you want, concrete floors are very hard to crack.

User avatar
Floyd
Posts: 521
Joined: Sun Jul 09, 2017 4:11 pm

Alter Boy

Post by Floyd » Sat Jun 29, 2019 8:34 am

Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.'

The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Dominic Savino?'

Yes, Father, it is.

'And who was the girl you were with?'

‘I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation.'

"Well, Dominic, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?'

‘I cannot say.’

‘Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?'

I'll never tell. '

“Was it Nina Capelli?'

“I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.'

“Was it Cathy Piriano?'

“My lips are sealed.'

“Was it Rosa DiAngelo, then?'

“Please, Father, I cannot tell you.'

The priest sighs in frustration. 'You're very tight lipped, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months. Now you go say a rosary and behave yourself.'

Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and whispers, 'What'd you get?'

'Four months vacation and five good leads.'

learning
Posts: 398
Joined: Tue Jul 11, 2017 4:57 pm

Drug Jokes

Post by learning » Fri Sep 06, 2019 12:33 pm

"I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day." --Anonymous LOL Happy Friday everyone!

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